At last, Michelle and I, and our three sons, Brett, Keegan, and Joel, arrived in Pezenas, a small town in Provence, France. It had been an entire month since we departed Canada for our four-month European adventure, which had already taken us through London, Paris, and most recently, Switzerland. To say we were tired of living out of a suitcase would be an understatement. The constant driving and daily search for places to eat and sleep proved to be more exhausting than Michelle and I had imagined. Our stay in Pézenas would be a respite from our traveling fatigue–a chance to settle into a semblance of our familiar life back home. Our plan was to spend the next six weeks in a three hundred-year-old house in the historic part of town, using it as our home-base for exploring southern France.
Unbeknownst to our sons, Michelle and I had already begun plotting our annual April Fools’ Day prank, a tradition we were determined not to miss while travelling through Europe. We had successfully tricked the boys five times; could we manage a sixth prank in Pézenas?
With April 1 still a month away, Michelle and I had ample time to brainstorm prank ideas. The previous year we had convinced the kids that they needed to get re-immunized against whooping cough after I had come into contact with an infected student at work. We exaggerated the size of the needle and said it involved a trip to the hospital’s emergency department. The year before that, we tricked them into believing they had to attend a special Saturday service at church during Lent, where each had to bring a possession they were thankful for to present at the service. Each year, we would reveal it was just an April Fool’s joke by driving to the local Dairy Queen instead of the place we’d set up for the prank.
In the meantime, we settled into our new home. Our mornings involved helping our sons with their homework, followed by afternoon adventures. These outings included trips to the Mediterranean Sea, Marseille, Barcelona, and the medieval village of Carcassonne. As the boys were enrolled in French immersion schools at home, Michelle and I encouraged them to practice their French during our excursions. However, they were very reluctant; speaking French to their classmates is one thing, speaking French to strangers in France is another. Their reluctance to converse in French with unfamiliar people became the inspiration for our next April Fools’ joke.
With less than a week, an idea for a prank came to Michelle as we passed a neighbour’s house, where we heard the sharp, screeching voice through an open window of an elderly lady scolding her daughter. This occurred more than once, and every time we would scurry past, not wanting to encounter this peculiar woman. Michelle and I decided the perfect joke was convincing the boys that the daughter had invited us for brunch. Michelle then added that the daughter’s mother would especially enjoy meeting our sons, since they could speak French with her. They believed every word and were not happy, especially about having to speak French. The thought of going the next day tortured them and was a constant topic throughout the day. Michelle and I sympathized with them, assuring them it would soon be over.
The next morning, everyone got dressed up for the occasion, and we discussed proper etiquette and reminded them to speak French during our visit. As we walked towards our neighbor’s house, Brett, Keegan, and Joel silently straggled behind. When we reached the door, we paused, then kept walking towards downtown. Our sons looked at us, bewildered, and Michelle and I shouted, “April Fools!” The look on their faces was priceless. Initially, there was relief at avoiding the brunch. Then the relief morphed into disbelief, followed by groans, as it sank in they’d been tricked once more. Keegan, who didn’t write very often in his trip journal, later wrote about how well he had been duped. After some good-natured gloating, we had a treat at a local bakery, as there’s no Dairy Queen in Pézenas. Once more our sons vowed revenge. We’re still waiting.
One Last Kick 